Perception versus Reality

2008-07-06T23:21:00.000-07:00

First Impressions Starts With the Introduction

"First impressions are often the truest, as we find (not infrequently) to our cost, when we have been wheedled out of them by plausible professions or studied actions. A man's look is the work of years; it is stamped on his countenance by the events of his whole life, nay, more, by the hand of nature, and it is not to be got rid of easily." William Hazlitt

We all know that first impressions do not necessarily start with the introduction, it starts the minute you are in the presence of others, answer the phone, or even open your mouth!

Take a moment and think of the opportunities you have to make a first impression?

As you think of those opportunities, think about the responsibility you have to ensure that each opportunity the person(s) you encounter first impression of you, is favorable.

Being consciously aware of the impressions we make is crucial!

In an interview with NeCole Cumberlander; Co-owner, Noire et Blanc, Co-founder/dean, Ohio, Academy of Paul Mitchell she said “What ever you do, let it be on purpose.” The statement stemmed from her explaining to me her success. Her business philosophy for every staff member in her salon is “A great service experience doesn't happen by accident, you have to create it.” The same refers to the impressions we want people to have of us. Later in the interview we talked about impressions. She followed with how the impressions people perceive is the impressions we want them to perceive. This supports her previous statement! I must say, her remarks are profound and exemplary to the perceptions people have of her. I respect her word and consider her very creditable, based upon her business success and professional success in the cosmetology industry, not to mention every one I personally have met that knows Mrs. Cumberlander always have great things to say about her and is lifted by the impressions they have.

There is a great debate whether “Perception is Reality!” Some argue that perception is perception; others argue that the reality you perceive is reality!

We can go back and forth arguing what is perceived and what is reality.

I am of the persuasion from life lessons that reality as we see it may not be the true reality, based on first impressions. Although it shapes the reality of how people perceive us, and the way we perceive others.

Reality for me is the reality I perceive until there is a paradigm shift that may sway my thoughts or behaviors. So the cliché that has been said for years “Perception is Reality,” no matter your argument of this known cliché that has been used in business and social conversations. Let us agree that truth stand no matter how harsh it may seem. You shape someone’s impression of you or you of someone else within a matter of seconds. We take a quick glance from head to toe and we notice their body language, facial expressions if their properly dressed and groomed, and decide if we want to know more about the person.

When meeting someone or being introduced we are being sized or sizing someone else. This will align with what we have heard for years, that we only get one chance to make a positive first impression. It is very hard to shift someone’s paradigm. As Mrs. Cumberlander said “What ever you do, let it be on purpose!”

Be in control of the impressions people have of you. It is advised to operate under the society norms of business and social protocol. Some key components that are relative to making a positive first impression is being aware and on target with the following:

Hygiene
Dressing the part of the occasion
Being on time
Posture
Firm Handshake
Eye Contact
Smiling
Proper Introductions

Some types of introductions, note: Stand if seated when introduced!

Self Introductions:

Always introduce your self with a firm handshake, smiling and giving direct eye contact with the person your engaging and give them your first and last name.

Ex: Hello my name is John Doe

Business Introductions:

Always introduce person of rank first, using their proper title. Mr. Mrs. Dr.
Terms May I introduce, or this is

Ex: Miss. Jane Doe may I introduce Mr. John Jones

Miss Jane Doe this is Mr. John Jones

Group Introductions:

Always introduce in the order the person is sitting or standing, in small groups.

Ex: Miss Doe may I introduce Miss. Joan Fox, Miss Linda Thomas

Additional tips:

Always share something about those you introduce that will help them engage in further conversation, this will be comfortable for all parties and give you a opportunity to move on.
When introducing dignitaries, elected official always say “I like to present.” This recognizes the level of respect that should be acknowledged.

Leverage your competition and implement the basic societal norms of introductions that shape the impressions people have of us. The goal is to get past the introduction and be taken seriously or even be heard. Whether it is get the initial or second interview, build business or social relationships, or even get a first date.

Written by, Vonetta Dumas
Image Management Specialist

Diverse Images Blog

Perception versus Reality